Funny quotes from some of my favorite residents
As I was writing the last post I thought of some of my favorite residents at the retirement home.
Shaun: How are you Flo?
Flo: Never better. That's what I always say...even if I'm not. Never better, that's what you've gotta say.
Toni (a woman): Want to be my boyfriend?
Shaun: What does it mean to be your boyfriend?
Toni: You come visit me and talk to me. That's all.
Shaun: I can do that, as long as you don't get jealous if I have other girlfriends.
Toni: I'm not the jealous type. I have 3 boyfriends.
A different conversation with Toni.
Toni: Do you have a girlfriend?
Shaun: What do you mean?
Toni: A girl that you take out to the movies or a play. A girl that you kiss.
Shaun: Well I go on dates with girls but I'm not kissing any of them right now.
Toni: Oh Shaun. You must kiss them. It's nice for the girl and it's nice for you.
Rachel (from Russia): Do you speak Russian Shaun?
Shaun: Ya ni gavaru paruski (the only Russian phrase I know: "I don't speak Russian")
Rachel proceeds to speak with me in Russian and refuses to believe me that I don't speak Russian.
Shaun: Hi Meryl.
Meryl: Do I know you?
Shaun: Yes I used to visit you when you were in the care center.
Meryl: Oh good because I like you.
She then chased me around the lobby making kissy noises. Good thing it wasn't hard to outrun a woman with a walker.
Joyce, a woman with dementia.
Joyce: There's my friend!(referring to me)
Attendant: What's your friend's name?
Joyce: I don't know, but we're friends. Excuse me. What's your name?
Shaun: Shaun
Joyce: That's a lovely name.
Variations of this conversation happened every day, but she always recognized me as her friend
A woman intent on keeping me humble.
woman: So you want to work with old people like me?
Shaun: I'm planning on going into geriatric medicine.
Woman: Nobody will like you. You look too young. Nobody wants a young kid telling them what to do. You should find a different profession.
Lowell: I've had a good life. I've outlived 8 husbands. I have a nice room with a good view and I wouldn't mind if I went to sleep and never woke up. I'm ready to die.
(She died in her sleep a few months later)
And finally, although not a resident of my retirement home, an Auntie Annie quote. As the Alzheimer's disease progresses she has difficulty expressing herself.
Auntie Annie: There is no joy in your feet. (Translation: get your feet off of my bed)
4 comments:
these are great. i love old people. it brought back memories from when we used to go and sing at one of the retirement homes in provo. good times. hey, if you're interested: http://bryanchild.blogspot.com
These are great. How did you know the translation of "There is no joy in your feet"? There must have been some context clues.
Lowell outlived EIGHT husbands?? You think she would have kind of gotten tired of that after four or five.
Toni sounds great. I wonder how many new boyfriends she's acquired since you left. You're not going to get jealous, are you? ;)
to Mrs M.: She kept pointing at my feet calling them big and asking me why I had to have my feet so big. Big is Auntie Annie's generic word when she doesn't remember the real word. I think she also said something about "get lost with your big feet" right before she told me there was no joy in my feet.
to Laura: Some people don't like to be alone. And Toni can have all the boyfriends she wants. I checked and found out that she's still alive. She should be around 96 now. She can't walk and is legally blind, but she's a hoot.
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